Mind Renewal – Day 4

January 6, 2020

Thankfulness: Another successful day of doing the active reaches 7 times yesterday. Setting an alarm and being willing to stop whatever T’m doing to pray and refocus my mind is so beneficial. It is difficult to stop what I’m doing in the moment, but I keep telling myself that my healing is more important than whatever I’m doing.

Step 1 (capture my thoughts) – this part is becoming tough because the thoughts that I’m capturing I know are there, however, they aren’t so fun to admit that I feel. God knows what I’m thinking – it’s not like I can hide it, for some reason I think if I ignore it I am somehow making it better. Still struggling with food and eating when Im stressed, annoyed, worried… Meditating on Psalm 19:14 is really making a huge difference! I am also really struggling with the pains in my family at this time. I know that we are all growing and learning, but what do I do with the pain I have in my heart.

Step 2 (pray and focus) – Today I’m imagining myself free from food issues (the shame that I’m not even sure where it comes from) and how it will feel to be free from that internal battle. What will it look like to not care about what I’m eating and instead listen to my body and fuel it the way it needs. It sounds amazing to have my mind free from diet, weight and food related thoughts. It will give me so much more energy and brain power to think about things that matter and do Kingdom work instead of flesh work. Reading in the book of Numbers and God has been revealing to me a lot of different things – I need to learn to stop living as a slave and start living for the promised land. To not be a taker but know and live in a way that reflects that God is my provision in all area! To love my family for where they are and never be offended or devensinve.

Step 3 (journal) – I see myself at the end of this with the ability to dodge hurtful comments and be able to walk away without defending myself or being hurt by them. I see myself able to know and discern what things are a me thing to work on and what things are issues/sins within others. I envision myself no longer hurt from the present or the past because I’m not living like a slave but living for the promised land. Knowing I’m being provided for in abundance by God and that I have left over to give to my family. I don’t need to hold onto everything in my tank in fear I’ll be emptied because I know that God is my provision. I see myself fully dependent on God for all my needs and that I wont lean on others or my circumstances to be filled. I see myself in a healthy relationship with food because I know that Jesus is the bread of my life, I see myself in a healthy relationship with my husband because I know that he is not my source of joy – Jesus is. I see myself no longer living from a place of brokenness because I know and see that God is using all things for the benefit of His kingdom and for those who love Him. I choose life – I choose to see what he is doing, by looking past my circumstances and seeing only Him.

Step 4 (pray and reflect) – Continue on Psalm 19:14 and proverbs 4:20-13. Reread my journal entry for today

Step 5 (active Reach) – Say this: “I choose to live free and not as a slave to food and fear of man. God is within me and guides me day and night. I will not be offended or act defensive. Food is a gift, my body is a gift and I will love both. I will stop living as a taker (slave) and live as a promised land traveler freely giving of myself to God for His work.

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